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…It’s been a long time since I’ve posted here, and I think it’s time I’ve shared my story with you. Over the years, I’ve talked a lot about “Twin Flames” and of course, Synchronicity. As I was dealing with all of this synchronicity in my life, I tried my best to interpret it, to follow it, allow it to guide me and move through me. As if I were allowing God, or some Higher Power within me to take the reigns, make my decisions and lead the way. And while this has certainly benefited me in many ways, I think one needs to realize the impermanence and fleeting nature of All things (my phone just lit up for “no reason” illuminating the time 4:44). We need to be open-minded to the possibilities for growth and change in All areas of our life, at any given moment, and to not pin ourselves down in an impossible web of crippling expectation/limitation. We need to let go. We need to be willing to take life as it comes to us, moment by moment, living fully in the Now. It is certainly beneficial to have hopes and dreams for the future… but we should not be so set on them, that we miss what is happening in front of us, in a feverish attempt at forcing things to happen exactly the way we had dreamed up. Our hopes and dreams will always be there, no matter what happens. However, the path that may lead us there, is perhaps far more variable than we had once imagined, and will undoubtedly surprise us.

My last relationship, which spanned 4.5 years and came to an abrupt end in October, was initially chock full of synchronicity. Everything from the manor in which we met, to details about our lives, to repeating symbolism, to a seemingly telepathic connection, and to shared dreams… we seemed destined to be together, as instructed by synchronicity (in that moment). Well, I got a bit excited. I thought, “Aha! I have found The One!” And would you know, I wasn’t even looking! Everything was perfect in my life at the time, and so was she. 3 months into the relationship, I spontaneously proposed to her, on top of a hill, in the middle (time & space) of our favorite music festival. I did not ask her to marry me. Instead… without a ring… not on one knee… I proposed something along the lines of, “Will you spiral upwards into Infinity with me? Learning and growing, together and apart, until the end of time?” She said yes.

I thought she was my Twin Flame, my literal other-half… the same soul split in two. And perhaps she is, or was, at the time, an embodiment or reflection of my True Self. However, my naming of this, grasping for totality, for Union… my selfish desire to fulfill an ideal, to mold my experience to fit neatly into a predefined box, had ultimately set me up for failure, and knocked me straight off of my path.

I interpreted my proposal as a proposal for marriage… “til death do us part”, forgetting what I had actually said and what I had truly meant, even though I had planned to propose again in the future the traditional way. I imagined that the Love between Twin Flames would be enough to keep us together, no matter what. And so I loved her, with all of my heart… I loved her so much, that I put all of my energy into her, and forgot about myself. I stopped doing many of the things I was passionate about, like making music… because at the time I was more focused on trying to figure out how I would create a space for us to live together in. Eventually I stopped seeing the signs, the repeating numbers, messages from the Earth’s creatures and from the angels that I was on the right path. In fact the only synchronicities I can recall were telling me that I needed to make a choice, that there was somewhere else I needed to be or something else I needed to be doing. Do you think I heeded these messages? No. I was where I needed to be anyways, in Union with my Twin.

JagnoMaia

“In sharing the lighting and smoking of the Sacred Pipe, [White Buffalo Woman] tells us:

This, your individual human life, like the single flame that burns this twig, is sufficient to light a great fire. As long as the love that burns within you is turned toward self-centered pursuits, it will remain tiny like this flame. Remaining tiny, it will bring you no joy. Eventually, in the swirling winds of spirit, it will be extinguished. But when you are in harmony with the Great Spirit, your flame of love is fanned by those same spirit winds. You are in love with the very purpose of life! You light the fire of love in all you meet. You know the purpose of your walk through this world, and you know why the Great One gave you a life flame: not so that you could keep your tiny flame to yourself, loving what you need only, but so that you could give it away, and with the fire of your love, bring consciousness to Earth.”

The Last Ghost Dance: A Guide for Earth Mages
By Brooke Medicine Eagle

They say the ultimate goal of Twin Flames is physical Union… in which both flames are serving their higher purpose incarnate on this Earth, and working together to do so. Gee, wouldn’t it be nice to have a spouse who likes the same things as you do? Who compliments your talents and shortfalls so perfectly that the 2 of you work together seamlessly/effortlessly, doubling each others’ effectiveness? Who both share a vision, a dream of a bright future for planet Earth and all of her creatures and wish to work together to fulfill this mission? Who thinks so alike you, that you rarely have disagreements and can always see each other eye to eye? Sounds a bit like a fairy-tale to me! Well, I just so happen to believe in fairy-tales…

They say that very few Twin Flames will ever make it to full physical Union in this lifetime. Perhaps that is a coping mechanism for people like myself whom subscribed to a belief-system just to have it come crashing down in front of me, forcing me to question those ideas I had attached to, or which had attached to me. And again, perhaps it is true. They say that after an initial “Bubble Phase” or “Honeymoon Phase”, it is common, if not absolute, that one of the Twins will run, and the other will chase. Perhaps she is running, and I was chasing… and that is the phase we are in now… and perhaps not. To me, this all sounds more like a template, of any relationship. 2 persons desire a lover, a partner, a companion… and they find each other… they hit it off, discover their chemistry, and fall into a bubble of excitement forgetting all else that ails them. They are whole, and complete… so they feel. Maybe they get married, and for a year or so they are so happy in love, enraptured in their exciting new journey together. Eventually the excitement wears off, and usually it is one who begins to realize first, they are not whole and there is much work to do. There is much work to do on oneself in order to grow and not become stagnant so that the relationship can continue to flourish. Perhaps these 2 are brave enough to stick it through together, and help each other through this process… potentially slowing their own growth, or who knows, maybe even accelerating it. If not, one will run, and the other will chase, not realizing what the other had realized sooner.

There are too many limitations involved in many relationships… people create all kinds of unrealistic expectations. We have to live in the same house, sleep in the same bed every night, you can’t do this without me, and I won’t do that without you, you can’t move unless we figure out a way for us to both move… etc. etc… These things are not impossible to navigate, but they definitely complicate things, and especially make it difficult to follow your heart, your intuition, and synchronicity. Personally… this experience for me has led me to believe that the notion of marriage is pretty obsolete (Just now I overhear my Mom talking on the phone with my brother, who is about to have his first child with his wife,”Yeah that’s kind of how it is, welcome to married life… as long as you can make it work.”) unless having a child – in which case I believe it is the responsibility of both parents to work together to take care of and raise that child, in which case marriage can help to strengthen their resolve and commitment to each other.

People grow, and people change… sometimes our lives intersect… but we all have our own path to walk and no two are the same. Though perhaps some lives spiral around each other, infinitely becoming closer and closer, throughout all eternity… so that maybe in one lifetime, they appear to be in total harmony: Union.

One thing remains certain in all of this to me. True Love comes from within. There is no person out there who can fill a void or space in our hearts… Twin Flames or not, that void is filled with the devotion of our own soul acting through us as Unconditional Love and compassion, in service of the Greater Good of All that Is.  This is our mission, and passion is the conduit through which it is expressed. To engage in our passions, is to love ourselves.

Surrender to the flow of the Divine will, and all else will follow.

Below is a poem I wrote to my ex, as a means of dealing with my emotions about our parting, in an attempt to let go completely and allow the universe to govern itself once again. Click the link for the actual document, picture included:

To-Miranda

Dearly Beloved,

I release you, I set you free
I cannot be with someone who doesn’t want me
So do as you please, and don’t worry…
Just be

Maybe someday love will bring us back together
Many things are uncertain, but one thing I know for sure…
My Love for you is undying, My Love for you is Pure

Your soul has touched mine, deeper than the ocean
Transformed me, from within
Heart Chakra wide open

Our meeting, by happenstance, was not without reason
So too is our parting… After all, ’tis the season

Follow your heart, it shan’t lead you astray
Hawaii is calling… perhaps there you may stay

Across a vast sea, far away you shall go
To embody the Yogi in you that I know

Limitless potential, residing within
Let the Return of the Divine Feminine begin!
You’re a Woman; You’re a Warrior; You’re a Goddess without sin!

There is no obstacle you cannot overcome
Shine light on the darkness, and away it will run

Love knows no boundaries, it endures all, my dear
I wanted this, to be Absolutely clear
So you can go on your journey, free of fear

If you ever feel alone, look to your heart
I Am Here

For any of you who is curious, Miranda recently completed her (200 hour? 300 hour? I don’t know, we haven’t been talking much) Yoga teacher training on the big island of Hawaii, where she will be moving in a month to hopefully start up a Yoga retreat center. I couldn’t be more proud of her for pursuing her dreams. That line in the poem above… “Hawaii is calling… perhaps there you may stay”… I had no idea why I even said that. It’s funny how things work out sometimes… Anyways, cheers to letting go!

I hope this helps someone in some way…

Namaste!


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Kaypacha – Pele Report (April 6, 2016)

“The more pleasure I can take
The more I move emotion
The more power I will have
To manifest creation”
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http://www.mysticmamma.com/new-moon-supermoon-in-aries-april-7th-2016/
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Mayan Calendar Portal – Tzolkin calculator

11 Akbal
Buluk – Tone 11
Buluk is the number eleven in the Mayan Sacred Calendar. It represents resolution.

Persons born on days with this tone drive change. They have a strong capacity for creating, harnessing and facilitating change, simplification and improvement. It is this energy that helps evolution take place in the universe.

Buluk is ruled by Yohualticitl, the Aztec goddess of birth.

Akb’al – Night/West
This is the 3rd day sign of the uinal. It means “night”, “house” or “hearth”. It carries a mystical Western energy.

Night is the bringer of dawn. Night persons are dreamers who bring with them the morning sun to illuminate and clarify the road of life. These people inhabit the Void, a place where nothing exists but all potential dwells–the womb of creation. It is here that Night persons conceive artistic inspiration and new ideas and solutions. But this place can bring dreams and inspiration as well as self-doubt and insecurity; so Night persons must make their journey with courage, understanding and insight.

Among the Maya, people born under his sign may become shamans, through their natural acquaintance with the darker regions of the human psyche. They may help dispel uncertainties and doubts born from these regions or the subconscious mind.

It is said that there is also a special kind of feminine softness in the people who embody this day sign. The meaning of “house” and “hearth” is linked to protecting one’s family and home and keeping the darker elements of the world out. This is why Night persons are often the storytellers or mythkeepers of their families or communities.
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From Joanne Sacred Scribes

ANGEL NUMBER 444

Number 4 resonates with the vibrations of the Archangels, practicality and responsibility, productivity, illumination and initiation, building solid foundations, stability and ability, honesty and inner-wisdom, determination and endurance, hard work and progress. Number 4 also represents our passion and drive and encourages us to work harmoniously yet diligently to achieve our goals and aspirations. Number 4 is also the number that represents the four elements of Air, Fire, Water and Earth, and the four sacred directions, North, South, East and West. With three 4’s appearing, the influences and energies of the number 4 are magnified and enhanced.

Angel Number 444 asks that you pay attention to your intuition and inner-wisdom as your connection with your angels and the angelic realm is very strong at this time. You are encouraged to continue on your current path as your drive and determination will lead to success and fulfilment.

Angel Number 444 is a message that the angels and Archangels are with you, encouraging and guiding you. They are offering you positive energies, inner-strength and
support to enable you to get the work done that you need to. They know and understand that you have been toiling diligently towards your goals, and encourage you to continue on your current path to achieve the success and results you desire. Use your strong connection with the angelic realm to your benefit and be open to their promptings and messages. Listen to your intuition and follow its guidance.

Angel Number 444 is a message that you have nothing to fear in regards to your life, work and Divine life purpose. When you take positive action towards your highest intentions, aspirations and goals, the Universe works in your favour and helps you to establish solid foundations and advance you along your path. Know that the angels surround and support you, encouraging you to keep up the good work you have been doing.

Angel Number 444 brings a message that ‘all is well’. Trust that you are on your correct life path and are doing a great job. The angels and Archangels are available for help and guidance  –  all you need to do is ask.

Oh boy… this is a little embarrassing… I might be completely full of shit

Then again maybe not… but you all knew that already

Today marks just over 2 years of my absence from this blog. Though I don’t know how many of you view regularly, I wish to apologize. I have spent the last 2 years diving further into many projects, learning new things and gaining vital life experiences. I took a bit of a break from creative expression. Today is a new day. Big changes are coming in my life, and I suspect in the world as well. I’ve answered the call to return to my mission (4:11) and follow the divine guidance of my intuition. Integration is so key, and our heart is guiding us along the way, urging us to answer the call and follow our gut instincts. Passion and desire are precursors to manifestation. If there ever was a moment for action it would be in the presence of these 2 driving creative forces. Coincidentally, the Sacral, or 2nd Chakra, represents the same energy: creativity, passion, desire, sexuality, emotion (energy in motion).

This blog post is more of a mantra, or a reminder to myself to complete the work I set out to do. At this moment I sit here surrounded by a group of like-minded young adults, working together on projects designed to influence the world and lift up those who live in it. The main project happens to utilize wordpress as a means for open source communication and user personalization. And thus I was brought back to my old wordpress site only to revisit my last post which happens to be a project that I considered continuing this morning. All afternoon I was gathering data to help me complete my research into numerological phenomena and how it can relate to the physical world in a practical application. Little did I know I was about to receive intuitive direction from my guides who prompt synchronicities.

If you do recall, I enjoy utilizing the Mayan Calendar Portal daily tzolkin readings:

IX
JAGUAR
NORTH
This is the 14th day sign of the uinal. It means “jaguar” or “death”. It carries a stealthy Northern energy.

Born with a deep love of Mother Earth, the Jaguar is directly tied to the source of all Earth energy. Jaguar energy is feminine in nature, capable of healing, and is the ruling spirit of jungles, plains and mountains. The Maya often call on the spirit of the Jaguar, who inhabits their temples, to assist them in spiritual as well as material matters.

The extreme intelligence of the Jaguar often comes paired with clairvoyance. This is the typical day sign for prophets and daykeepers among the Maya: they possess great power of intellect, strength of character and the ability to see through the night.

Their strength gives them extraordinary patience, which can suddenly explode in bursts of decision and action; but their focus tends to be very narrow and they are rarely open to exploring alternative life paths.

Secretive, bold and mystical, Jaguar persons tend to be difficult to get a hold of or understand; their relationships are often complicated and their secretiveness makes it rather challenging to live with them. They often simply just turn up, disappearing as quickly as they appear. Their challenge in life is to be humble and open to other people.

BOLON – TONE 9
Bolon is the number nine in the Mayan Sacred Calendar. It represents patience, perseverance and completion.

Persons born on days with this tone place great emphasis on the big-picture view of things, on a larger perspective on all aspects of life. With this energy, plans or projects move toward completion so that they may begin their life or destiny in full. Completion is crucial for people of this tone; if completion is not attained, it can cause pain and suffering.

Bolon is ruled by Quetzalcoatl, the Aztec god of light.

It’s clear to me I’m meant to collaborate if I am to ever complete my project(s).

Life is a never ending roller coaster… it’s filled with ups and downs, changes in direction (twists and turns)… fear and joy. You are free to look which ever way you wish and see what you decide… but you’re path is pre-determined, you’re just along for the ride! What’s the use in fighting that? You’re strapped in, and you chose to hop on that roller coaster… you chose to be here… If you try to get out and escape you’ll end up losing your life as you are no longer grounded to the safety of the roller coaster of life. Might as well make the most out of your experiences while you have the opportunity and accept all experiences (the good and the bad) along the path you walk!

Fear not! Enjoy the ride! When it reaches the end… you are free to get out of your seat and determine your own reality — the reward of sticking it through to the end 🙂

Let the sunrise bring you into the light! I just made this (sound only) for my final project for my Synthesis and Sound Design class. I hope you enjoy, as well as the twist at the end 😉 Disclosure is near.